You can't put Willy where Willy won't go...

Pop quiz:

There a large freezer in a box prohibiting you from closing your back hatch. Do you:

1) Ask the store to hold it until you can come back with the truck that is sitting in your driveway at home.
2) Go back in to the store, buy some bungee cords or rope and tie the hatch down, thus securing the freezer in your way-back and keeping the hatch from flying open.
3) Test the fit two or three times, notice that the hatch isn't coming CLOSE to closing, and then slam the hatch door down as hard as you possibly can, ramming the corner of said freezer through the glass, causing an extremely loud explosion. Your wife will then scream, because your baby, who was sitting in her seat RIGHT NEXT TO YOU when you decided to bust out the car window, starts wailing and your wife is concerned that she just got showered in broken glass.

If you answered (3), then you are my husband, and thus a raging fucktard. A regular fucktard would have tried to convince you that you could lay down the whole back seat and then wedge the baby in between the freezer and the side of the car.

I'm creating a new social class--the yuppie redneck:


Yes, that is a dollar store shower curtain taped to my Highlander. Classy!